Friday, March 29, 2013

Speechless.....

Two posts in one day....whoa, I don't really know what's happening! haha

I just have to share with everyone.

**WARNING** I am about to get all gushy, mushy, and very personal. So if this isn't your thing, don't read any further. If it is your thing, grab a tissue.

For those that do not already know, I am a labor doula.
I was just interviewing with a potential client when in the middle of conversation, she realizes I'm the surrogate she has been following in a parenting group on Facebook we are both a part of.

This was her reaction:
"Oh my God, you're THE Kimberly?! You're like a legend! I can't believe I'm talking to you right now! I'm kind of like...starstruck! LOL"

I can't even tell you how that made me feel!!!!!!!
Not in a big-headed, stuck-up way, more of a heart swelling, teary eyed, deeply touched, I can't believe someone just said that about me, way!

That just made my whole year!!!!!

To know I am making THAT kind of mark on people with my surrogacy journey...there are no words. I am doing things in my life I never thought I would....making a difference for people, being their inspiration....growing up how I did, I never thought it was possible I could be that person.

You have to understand. I did not grow up in a life that raised me to be this person. By statistics, I should be living the exact opposite. I was not treated very well by the man that took part in raising me. I don't usually talk about this much, but to really grasp where I am right now in response to that potential client's reaction...a nutshell explanation is necessary.

I was told as a child I would grow up to be no good. Becoming a mother at 16, I was told my life was going nowhere, I would never amount to anything, etc.

And here I am, being told things like I'm "like a legend" and being referred to as "THE Kimberly" in a positive way, because of the choices I have made and things I have decided to do with my life....I just can't even put into appropriate words what that does to me emotionally. What it does to my heart. (All in good ways of course!!)

I have spent much of my life, including my adult life, looking at people who inspire others, who have inspired me, listened to people rave about others that do such amazing things with their lives and touch so many people; I see them, in complete "awe" wishing I could be like that one day. That one day, people may see me as I see them. But always thinking that would never be me. I can't ever be like that. Not in a celebrity type of way, but in positive light, to be seen as a positive person that makes a difference in the world.

I just had that day. That moment. If that person was in front of me right now, I'm pretty sure I would be strangling her with a hug. Such a sweet woman to say amazingly sweet things to me; to see me as she does....

To know I AM amounting to something. I AM making a difference. I AM touching people and inspiring them. To be heard. Respected in that way....

I never felt I was that person before now. Never. I still don't really FEEL it, but just to know that someone sees me like that...is such an amazing feeling.

Thank you, to the woman that said those things to me. You know who you are. You didn't know it, you didn't even try, but you have made a huge mark on me by your words. A mark so big and important to me, I will always remember it. Thank you so much for your kind heart.

I'm on a teary cloud nine right now!!!!!!!!!

Much love xoxo

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